Laguna and Squall's Excellent Mis-Adventure!
by Matrixaliesie
Summary: Laguna is just a single father struggling to raise an aloof teenage son and run a country at the same time. When he gets a call from his sons school that he had gotten in a fight he decides its time for some father/son bonding time in the form of a road trip from Esthar to Deling City.
1. Chapter 1

Alright! before we get started with this, I have to thank Lecritic for both inspiring this fanfic and beta reading/editing. I was originally planning on publishing this a while ago but better late than never I suppose! anyway enjoy and let me know what you think in the reviews!

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Laguna Loire was bored. He sat behind his large desk, his chin resting in his hands as he listened to his head of security give a detailed safety briefing. It was hard to pay attention. The subject bored him to tears and he had the added distraction of worrying about his son. As he sat there feigning interest in the presentation, he thought about the phone call he'd received from his son's headmaster just an hour prior.

Laguna had never gotten a call from school before, so he was surprised when the call came through on his direct line. Not many people had access to his private number, just Kiros, Squall and Esthar Prep, the private school Squall attended. As Laguna lost focus on the briefing, he kept replaying the conversation in his head.

"Mr. President?" the headmaster asked cautiously.

"Yup, that's me!" Laguna answered, rather excited to get a call from someone besides Kiros.

"Sir, this is headmaster Cid of Esthar Prep. I'm sorry to bother you, I'm sure you're very busy..."

At the time, Laguna wasn't busy at all, but he didn't tell the headmaster that.

"What can I do for you Cid?" Laguna replied. No reason to be formal. Laguna was not a formal guy.

"Well sir, I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but your son was involved in an incident here on campus today," Cid said.

Laguna felt a swell of panic as he imagined the worst. Had Squall broken a bone? Been shot at? Scraped a knee? Frantic with worry, he jumped to his feet, prepared to run out the door.

"Is he alright?!"

"Oh, he's not hurt, but he was in a fight with another student," the headmaster said. "He and the other student have had confrontations with one another in the past, but they never resorted to violence before. As you know, we have a strict zero tolerance policy regarding violence. Both of them have received detention this time, but if it happens again, we will have no choice but to expel the both of them,"

Laguna sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose at the headmaster's stern tone.

"I understand. I'll speak with him about it," he replied gravely. "Thank you for letting me know."

"See that you do. Thank you for your time, sir."

Laguna hung up the phone, sat back in his chair and buried his face in his hands.

"Do you agree with this plan of action Mr. President?"

Laguna snapped out of his train of thought, momentarily confused by the head of security's question. He had apparently been going over the security protocol for Laguna's upcoming visit to Deling City.

"Oh...yeah...sure, whatever," he agreed absent-mindedly.

He wasn't even listening to what was being said, but the slide show seemed fairly well done. Laguna slipped back into his thoughts as he tried to figure out why Squall would be getting into fights at school. Squall was stubborn, just like his mother, Hyne rest her soul, but he wasn't aggressive unless provoked. He was quiet and kept to himself and he'd never been in trouble at school before.

 _Maybe he was standing up for himself_ , Laguna thought.

He had always told Squall never to throw the first punch but to also never be a punching bag. "If you don't defend yourself, no one will," Laguna told him.

 _Maybe he's lashing out because I haven't spent enough time with him…_

That thought sent his mind into a frenzy. Thoughts came fast and furious as Laguna pondered how to handle this.

 _Maybe we should we do something together. But what? Obviously, if I'm here everyone is going to want me to approve this, or deny that, or be pulling me every which way. Maybe we need to get away. I hear Balamb is nice this time of year, and he will be out of school for Spring Break this afternoon… Fisherman's Horizon would be good, too, I suppose… And I've always wanted to take him to Mog's Moogle World outside Timber!_

He couldn't decide which one he wanted to do with Squall. He obviously couldn't spend the entire two-week break at these places but, he did have a week till he had to be in Deling City.

 _We could probably get to all those places within a few days no problem! If we were to leave now…_

His train of thought spiraled into a risky tunnel of wondrous possibility.

 _I'm sure these guys won't mind if I take off for a few days._

As Laguna settled on the perfect idea, he started to get excited. Really excited.

"ROAD TRIP!" he shouted as he shot to his feet in jubilation. Everyone in the room jumped at his sudden outburst and stared at him as if he'd lost his mind.

"Uhh…sir?" the head of security stuttered.

"I'm gonna take Squall on a road trip!" he declared. He placed his hands on his hips and stuck out his chest. "We need some father-son bonding time!"

"I'm going to have to insist that you don't do that sir," the head of security said sternly.

What a buzz-kill this guy was! Didn't he understand Squall was more important than Laguna's presidential duties? Laguna heard him, sort of. And sort of not. His mind was already planning out all the things he and Squall could do together how much fun this was going to be.

"We can go fishing, eat some famous fish fry in Balamb, and ride some roller coasters!"

"Sir, no," Mr. Boring Security Man protested.

"I'll just go get a car, pick him up from school and we can be in Deling by Friday!"

Laguna was lost in his own world, imagining the way Squall's face would light up in excitement at the gates of Magical Moogle World. This was going to be great.

"Sir, you can't do that!"

Laguna ignored the man and ran out of the room, oblivious to the stunned silence that followed in his wake.

~0~0~0~

Squall pushed the broom mindlessly through the gymnasium. He was only half done. The rest of the students had been let out hours ago, but Squall was stuck at school doing chores they paid the janitor to do. It was his own fault for throwing the first punch, but still.

No big deal. It could have been worse. He could have gotten suspended.

Having to clean the gym in addition to detention wasn't really that bad. At least he didn't have to look at Seifer while he worked. The headmaster thought it best to separate them, so Seifer was assigned cleaning duty in the auditorium. Squall had a feeling Seifer was just sitting around doing nothing. Not that Squall cared.

Squall wasn't entirely sure why he had been made the target of Seifer's ridicule, but ever since he'd arrived at the beginning of the school year, Seifer had been harassing him. He would do stupid, annoying things like dump Squall's tray of food on the floor at lunch or slam Squall's locker shut on him. Squall ignored most of it, expecting Seifer to get bored and finally give up if he didn't react.

Ignoring Seifer didn't work. It just made it worse, and recently, Seifer had changed his tactics. Squall finally got fed up with the daily torment, decided to put an end to it and took a swing. And now here he was, sweeping the gym as punishment. At least Seifer had wound up with a black eye. That almost made the detention worth it.

He finished his last half hour and made his way to the front gate of the school. He avoided going past the auditorium in case Seifer was there. He wasn't in the mood for round two. Seifer would be out for pay-backs, and Squall no longer had the element of surprise in his favor.

Squall was surprised when he got to the gate. Instead of the usual car and armed guards that normally picked him up, it was his father. Laguna was alone, which was cause for concern in itself, but it was the giant, cheesy smile on his face that made Squall extra wary.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Squall asked.

Laguna frowned at the unfriendly greeting.

"That's how you greet me? I go out of my way to pick you up from school and instead of 'Hello' I get 'what the hell are you doing here?'"

Squall said nothing. He narrowed his eyes at his father and waited for Laguna to answer the question.

Laguna sighed, and shook his head at him. Then, the cheesy grin was back and bigger than ever. Squall cringed at the sight of it. Whatever Laguna was up to, Squall was sure he wouldn't like it.

"Were going to Deling City!" Laguna said and threw his hands in the air with exaggerated excitement.

"No." Squall deadpanned.

"Yes!" Laguna retorted.

"No, you're going to Deling City at the end of the week. I'm going home."

Squall started to walk away but Laguna stopped him before he could get past the car.

"We're gonna go on a road trip for your Spring Break! Doesn't that sound like fun?"

"No, it sounds like a terrible idea."

It really did. Squall couldn't imagine anything worse than being trapped in a car with his father for days on end. He would rather go for round two with Seifer right now than have anything to do with this plan.

"You sound like that security guy!" Laguna scoffed, crossing his arms. "Whatshisname."

Squall looked at Laguna in total confusion.

"His name is Matt," Squall said. "He's worked for you for ten years. How do you not know his name?"

"Pfft…" was all Laguna could muster in response to that question. "Jest get in the car and we'll get going!"

Laguna opened the passenger door and waved Squall toward the seat.

"No," Squall said. He shut the door and glared at his father.

"Yes!"

Laguna opened the door again with that same cheesy smile. "Get in the car, son."

"NO," Squall said more forcefully and slammed the door again.

Laguna narrowed his eyes at Squall. Laguna didn't expect him to be so difficult about this. Of course, Laguna didn't expect him to agree straight away, either. He didn't want to do what he was about to do, but it seemed Squall left him with no choice.

Squall didn't like the look Laguna was giving him, and he started to slowly back away.

He didn't move fast enough.

Laguna launched himself at Squall with more speed than Squall knew he was capable of and hoisted him up onto his shoulder. Even though Laguna was almost fifty, he was still pretty strong and agile. He forced Squall into the car before he could put up any kind of resistance, and fastened Squall's seatbelt for him like he was a child. Feeling victorious, Laguna made his way to the driver's seat and locked the doors so Squall couldn't escape. Before Squall knew what was going on, they were on the road.

"Why are you doing this to me?" Squall asked.

"Your headmaster called and told me about the fight. I think you need this," Laguna explained casually.

"Normal parents ground their children for fighting. They don't take them on international vacations…" Squall mumbled.

"Well I, am not a normal parent!" Laguna said proudly.

"You're not normal, alright…"

Laguna glared half-heartedly at Squall and continued driving.

Squall said nothing else and stared out the window at the city as they headed down the highway. He expected Laguna to turn off at the exit for the air station, but he drove right past it. Then, they came up on the exit for the train station. Squall thought Laguna wanted to take the more scenic route of going via train, but they drove past that, too. He started to get slightly worried about what Laguna had planned.

"You know you just passed the train station and the air station right?" Squall asked anxiously.

"Yup! We're going on a road trip!"

"So, instead of grounding me, you choose to torture me."

"Oh, don't be such a drama queen Squall! It'll be fun!"

Squall sighed and leaned back in his seat, crossing his arms angrily as Laguna drove out of the city.

This was so not going to be fun.

~0~0~0~

The next few hours were spent in almost complete silence, except for Laguna's frequent attempts to start a conversation with Squall. Laguna would say something and all he got in return was one of three responses: a disgruntled sigh, a groan of annoyance, or an eye roll. Squall was refusing to say a word no matter how hard Laguna tried, but Laguna was determined to bring Squall out of his shell. They were going to be stuck in a car for the next few days. Squall would have to talk eventually.

By the time they reached the Horizon Bridge, it was around dinner time. Laguna was hungry and he would bet Squall was likely hungry as well.

They were still a few hours from FH. Laguna drove a little further down the bridge till all that could be seen all around was ocean. He pulled the car off to the side, making sure to leave enough room for Squall to open his door and shut the engine off.

"Are you hungry?" Laguna asked.

He didn't wait for Squall to answer, he simply unbuckled his seatbelt and exited the car making sure to take the keys with him.

That little detail did not escape Squalls notice. It was well within the realm of possibility that Squall might lock his father out of the car and debate with himself about whether or not to just drive off and leave Laguna stranded on the bridge. Squall almost smiled as he imagined the expression on Laguna's face in the rear-view mirror as he hightailed it out of there.

Laguna popped open the trunk of the sleek black sedan and retrieved a small blue plastic cooler. He praised himself internally for thinking ahead and packing some food for the two of them to tide them over until they reached their first destination. It was only sandwiches, but it would hold them over till they could get something more substantial. After closing the trunk, he made his way over to the railing of the bridge and climbed onto it, letting his feet dangle over the edge.

Squall refused to leave the car. He sat in the passenger seat with his arms crossed over his chest like a pouting toddler. He had no desire whatsoever to be in that car, but he also didn't want to get out. He was hungry, and he knew that Laguna would try to talk to him again. Squall could easily just ignore him but that wasn't the point. He was not pleased about being forced on this trip in the first place. Silence was Laguna's punishment for forcing him into the car and forcing him to suffer through this ridiculous plan. Squall knew how much Laguna hated silence and Squall took full advantage of it every time it was necessary. Which was often.

But he was hungry, and Laguna had a cooler full of food.

Squall growled at himself and climbed out of the car. He begrudgingly took a seat next to Laguna. Laguna, of course, had that stupid, cheesy smile on his face as he handed Squall a sandwich.

"I would have liked to make some food for the trip," Laguna said taking a bite of his sandwich. "But considering how I made my grand escape by climbing out the window, that would have been pressing my luck."

Squall wondered how he'd wound up with the unfortunate luck of having such a moron for a father. The man was the President of Esthar and he acted like a fool nearly all the time. Climbing out windows and kidnapping his own son; it was ridiculous. Who did that?

They sat in silence while they finished eating. Squall found this surprising but he welcomed the silence. Squall stared out over the ocean as he ate his sandwich, taking notice of the dark storm clouds forming on the horizon. It was no secret that driving on the bridge wasn't always the safest due to the strong storms that could blow through, especially this time of year. Squall had a feeling the rapidly building storm was the only reason they didn't see any other cars on the bridge, or even a train for that matter.

"We should probably get going, I'd like to be in FH by nightfall!"

Laguna quickly climbed back over the railing and into the car, he put the cooler in the backseat for easy access to drinks and snack he'd stuffed in it.

Squall was surprisingly eager to return to the car. Of course there really was nowhere else for him to go. They continued down the road, Laguna seemed completely unaware of the storm clouds that had crept ominously closer as they continued their journey.

They were about an hour outside FH when Laguna's cell rang. He checked the caller ID and answered when he saw it was Kiros.

"Honestly Kiros, I'm surprised at you for not calling sooner," Laguna greeted.

"Well, I didn't expect you to tie up all your bed sheets to climb out the window like a child," Kiros retorted.

"You were wrong to think I wouldn't do that," he chuckled into the phone.

"Where are you? Matt is freaking out, and quite honestly this is one of the dumbest things you've done in a long time…" Kiros lectured.

Laguna pretended to listen to Kiros for a minute but then rolled down his window to blow air into the mic of the phone to create interference.

"What was that? I can't hear you!" Laguna said loudly.

"LAGUNA!" Kiros shouted on the other end.

Laguna didn't respond. With a grin, he threw his phone out the window. Without missing a beat, he simply rolled up the window and continued driving.

Squall was shocked that at what Laguna had just done. He was about to say something but his own phone began to ring. He fished it from his pocket, and answered, knowing it was Kiros, calling to make sure Laguna hadn't driven them off the bridge.

"What did he just do?" Kiros asked.

"He threw his phone out the window," Squall replied.

"Again? Of course he did…" Kiros sighed.

Kiros was about to say something else but Squall didn't get a chance to hear it. Laguna snatched Squall's phone out of his hand, rolled down the window and out it went to join Laguna's phone on the bottom of the sea.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Squall yelled.

"I'll buy you a new one in Deling City," Laguna said calmly.

"So... Now we have no phones. What if we need to call for help?" Squall asked angrily.

"We'll be fine!" Laguna said cheerfully.

Almost as if on cue, the car started to rumble. Laguna looked down at the dash to see the tire pressure light illuminated. They had a flat tire.

Squall sighed in disgust. "Great, if we had our phones we could call for help,"

"We don't need help. All we have to do is change the tire," Laguna placed the car in park and shut the engine off. "No big deal. Wanna learn?"

"No," Squall said. "Knock yourself out."

Laguna spent the better part of an hour trying to get the flat tire off as Squall watched the storm clouds build and pick up speed. The storm was closing in fast. Laguna had just put the first of the six lug nuts on the spare when the first drop of rain hit the windshield and the first clap of thunder echoed and rolled over the ocean. A second later, the sky darkened and it began to pour. Laguna managed to get the tire on and himself in the car before his clothes were completely soaked through.

"WOO! It's a little wet out!" Laguna joked as he started the car once again.

The drove at a much slower pace due to the heavy rain and strong wind, but after a few hours they finally made it safely to FH, and checked into the hotel for the night.

"Get some rest Squall! I want to get a pretty early start in the morning. Were going fishing!"

Squall rolled his eyes as he entered his hotel room, he immediately flopped down on the bed and fell sound asleep.

Laguna was exhausting.


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks again to Lecritic for beta reading/editing!

* * *

Squall was awoken the next morning by three separate things that all happened at the exact same time. First, was the nightmare he had about being forced into going on a road trip by his idiotic, scatterbrained father. Second, was the bright sunlight shining directly into his face, and third, was the vigorous and violent knocking at his door. Needless to say, Squall was not happy.

He blocked the sun with his hand and slowly opened his eyes. Nothing about this room was familiar. The wallpaper was some shade of teal with various types of seashells printed on it, the dresser was basically a cheaply made pine box, and the television that sat on top of it was just as cheap and possibly older than he was. As he shook off the dregs of sleep, he suddenly realized that his nightmare wasn't a nightmare. It was reality.

"SQUALL! WAKE UP!" Laguna shouted from the other side of the door.

Squall groaned, rolled over onto his side and wrapped his pillow around his head in an attempt to drown Laguna out. Laguna knocked harder and called out for him again. Squall refused to get up and answer the door. He curled into a ball and prayed that Laguna would just give up and go away.

When the knocking stopped, Squall sighed in relief. It was a small victory, but one he would quietly enjoy. He closed his eyes and tried to fall back asleep.

He was almost out when he heard the door open and something very heavy landed on his bed with such force, Squall was launched a few inches off of the mattress.

It was Laguna. Of course it was.

"Come on Squall, get up! We've got a lot to do today!"

Squall grunted and rolled back over to bury his face in the pillows.

"Go away," he mumbled and settled down to get comfortable again.

"Rise and shine," Laguna sang.

Squall didn't dignify that with a response.

"Cuchi-cuchi..." Laguna said. "Here I come."

Squall didn't think his father could possibly be more annoying, but of course, Laguna proved him wrong.

Laguna began to jump on the bed like an over-gown toddler. Squall tried his best to pretend this wasn't happening, but it proved to be impossible. Every time Laguna's feet hit the mattress, Squall was launched into the air, only to return to the mattress with a bounce. He gritted his teeth in frustration. He would not give in to these shenanigans, no matter how frustrating or annoying it was.

Did the man have any kind of maturity? It was difficult to believe that this buffoon was the leader of the largest and most powerful country in the world. Who in their right mind thought that was a good idea? And how the hell did he keep getting reelected? From the way Laguna acted, Squall wouldn't have trusted him with a marshmallow launcher, let alone an entire country.

When Squall's skull collided with the headboard, Squall decided enough was enough. He grabbed one of the pillows, sat up, and whacked Laguna right in the head with it.

Laguna lost his balance, stumbled backward and fell off the bed. He hit the floor with a painful sounding thud.

"ow…" Laguna said in a flat tone as if it didn't hurt at all.

"Get out!" Squall yelled.

"Boy, someone's grumpy this morning," Laguna laughed. "Did you wake up on the wrong side of the bed?"

Squall said nothing, but Laguna's big, cheesy grin made Squall wish he had the power to make Laguna's head explode. He did not have the patience for Laguna's stupid dad jokes. Or anything else Laguna-related.

Laguna chuckled, got up off of the floor, and headed for the door. As he reached for the knob, he grinned back at Squall over his shoulder.

"Get dressed and meet me downstairs for breakfast," Laguna said. "Oh, and I brought your suitcase."

He placed a roll away bag just inside the door as he left the room. Squall sighed and fell backwards onto the mattress and rubbed the bridge of his nose. He contemplated just going back to sleep, but he was now wide awake and much too irritated for sleep. With a growl of frustration, he threw the covers off and made his way to the bathroom to shower and get ready for the day. Normally he showered at night, right before going to bed, but because the trip here had been so exhausting, he hadn't gotten the chance. He didn't even remember when he had stripped off his school uniform, but he had woken up in nothing but his under shirt and boxer shorts.

When he was finished with his shower, he decided it was best to shave. He wasn't a fan of stubble. It was itchy and unpleasant and unkempt looking. Squall was not vain, but hygiene was important. He was glad that the hotel had toiletries provided so he didn't have to search through the suitcase to try and find the ones Laguna had packed, if any at all.

Freshly showered and shaved, he made his way back to the main room with a towel around his waist to get dressed. He lifted the case with little effort, and it made him wonder about what Laguna had packed. Even if it was for just a week, there should be more weight to it.

He cautiously unzipped the bag. He was relieved to find clothes inside, but as he picked through the wadded up items, he saw they were not clothes that he normally wore. No, these were much, much worse. They were things that Laguna had given him as gifts for birthdays and various holidays and all of them were things he swore he would never wear.

He picked through the mess with growing dismay. There were two ugly sweaters, one bright orange with chocobos, the other black with t-rexaur heads all over it. There was a long sleeve shirt in a print that hadn't been in style since before Laguna was born, a seafoam green polo shirt and a shiny purple jacket that Squall had never seen before.

Worse than that was the fact that Laguna hadn't packed him any socks or underwear.

And not a single pair of pants.

He opened the zippered pouch on the front in search of the missing articles of clothing or toiletries and found it empty.

Squall dropped his face into the palm of his hands and sighed. What as he supposed to do with this?

It crossed his mind to put on the ugly t-rexaur sweater and nothing else and go sit down at the breakfast table, just for the sake of revenge, but he'd rather not be naked as a jaybird from the waist down where people could see him. But it was fun to think about the look on Laguna's face if he actually did it.

This was possibly the worst thing Laguna had done so far. It even trumped being forced on this trip against his will. Squall was left with only one option: to put his dirty school uniform back on. No way in hell would he be caught dead in any of the clothes Laguna had packed.

In a mood more foul than when he had awoken, Squall quietly made his way down to the main floor of the hotel. He didn't like being in his uniform when he wasn't in school, and he especially didn't like wearing it when it was dirty. Not that he'd been rolling around in the dirt or anything, but there was a smudge or two on one sleeve from his brawl with Seifer, and the shirt and pants were both wrinkled. Not to mention, Esthar was hot this time of year and he had to clean the gym the day before and he had to sit in a car with Laguna for hours. He definitely felt gross. Laguna was going to pay for this. Squall didn't know how, but he would think of something.

"Bout time sleepy head!" Laguna called as Squall entered the hotel café.

"I wasn't sleeping; I was getting ready." Squall replied as he forcefully pulled a chair out to sit down.

"Did you not like the clothes I packed you?" Laguna asked, referring to Squall's uniform. He sounded slightly hurt.

Squall wanted to lay into him right there. Was he joking? Did Laguna even look at the clothes he'd thrown into the bag?

Squall didn't want to make a huge scene, in spite of his anger, and Laguna would definitely make it a huge scene. Squall rolled his eyes and bit back every nasty thing he could have said. He would deal with Laguna later. Right now he was, pretty hungry and planned to take full advantage of the breakfast buffet the hotel offered.

Without a word, he excused himself from the table. Laguna followed close behind, but to Squall's surprise, Laguna didn't say anything as he filled up a plate with eggs, bacon and biscuits.

They ate silence, which was perfectly fine with Squall, but Laguna was uncomfortable with it. His eyes darted between his plate and Squall as he waited for Squall to say something to him.

It was a stand-off. A stand-off that Squall knew Laguna would eventually lose. Laguna could never resist filling a silence with nonsense.

Squall was amazed when Laguna went the entire meal without saying anything at all. It was something that had never happened before, and he had an urge to mark the date on his calendar. He would celebrate the anniversary the time Laguna said nothing every year from now until infinity because Squall was sure it would never happen again. Of course, Squall couldn't put it in his calendar because Laguna had thrown his phone out the window.

Even though it meant losing the stand-off, Squall was forced to speak first.. He wasn't happy about it, but he needed new clothes. He would rather walk around naked than don the monstrous sweaters Laguna had packed. Especially since it was fairly warm in FH.

Sweaters! What had Laguna been thinking? No to mention, the lack of actual pants in the suitcase was a big problem.

"I need new clothes."

Laguna offered a victorious grin. Damn him. He'd won and he knew it! Squall gritted his teeth and tried not to feel like he'd been duped into talking.

"What's wrong with what I packed you?" Laguna asked, taking a sip of his orange juice.

"Well, other than the fact that you only packed items from my donation pile, you also neglected to pack me socks, underwear and PANTS," Squall explained bitterly. "Not to mention, no soap, no razors, no shaving cream, no shampoo..."

"Alright, alright!" Laguna said and held up his hands in defeat. "I'll admit I did pack in a hurry, I may not have looked at what I threw in there. But honestly, what do you really need socks for this time of year?"

"Well unlike you, I'm not a fan of open toe footwear any time of the year." Squall answered.

Laguna narrowed his eyes at that jab. So what if he preferred to wear sandals? They were comfortable, plus they kept his feet cool. Instead of arguing with Squall further, he let out a heavy sigh and rolled his eyes and decided it was time for them to start their day.

"Let's go pick you out some clothes so we can get going." Laguna said.

Their hotel was within walking distance of the stores. Squall needed some air, so he didn't protest when Laguna suggested they walk. Much to Squall's dismay, every store carried the same style of clothing: button down shirts in wild tropical flower print, khaki pants and shorts, and… sandals.

Squall was in hell. What was with this town and their tacky taste in apparel? Laguna, of course, loved it. He bought six shirts for himself, a pair of khaki shorts and a pair of sandals that were exactly like the sandals on his feet. Squall tried his best to find the least objectionable shirts possible. It wasn't easy. His options were limited to ugly and uglier.

Eventually, he managed to find a few shirts in solid colors, but he was stuck with a few tropical flower print ones that looked like they'd find a nice home in Laguna's closet once this nightmare was over. Worse was that every store seemed to be sold out of any type of footwear except sandals. He would have worn his school shoes, but that would have looked even worse. So he was stuck having to make a choice between brown and black sandals that were a little too similar to Laguna's.

At the last store they visited; Laguna managed to talk Squall into wearing his new clothes instead of the uniform. Squall stepped out of the dressing room wearing a white short-sleeve button down with red tropical flowers printed on it, khaki cargo shorts and, of course, a pair of brown sandals.

"You look great son!" Laguna exclaimed as squall stepped out from behind the curtain.

 _I hate you right now_ … Squall thought as he glared at Laguna.

Squall said nothing as Laguna paid for their purchases. He was too humiliated to say anything. Being forced on this road trip was bad enough, but there were no words for being forced to dress like his father because his father sucked at packing.

It was almost lunch time when they finished their shopping. They were headed back to the hotel when Laguna spotted a small fishing gear vendor. He had planned on taking Squall fishing before the sun had come up like real fishermen do, but he'd overslept, and he didn't want to miss breakfast. Now, they had plenty of time. They could even rent a boat!

"Squall, hold up a second," Laguna said and stopped Squall. "Let's go fishing!"

"Now?" Squall protested.

"Of course! We've got time before we have to catch the ferry to Balamb!" Laguna said happily.

"Wait, Balamb? I thought you were just driving us across the Horizon Bridge to Deling City?"

Squall was not happy that Laguna had planned other stops, and he wasn't happy that Laguna hadn't bothered to mention it. Not that it mattered, but it would be nice to know exactly where he was being taken so he could come up with a plan of escape if Laguna's shenanigans made Squall consider actual homicide.

"What kind of road trip would that be?" Laguna laughed, "Come on, lets rent a boat and fish for a bit."

Squall decided it was best not to argue. If he tried to argue the point or put up any kind of resistance, Laguna might have done what he had in Esthar and just thrown Squall over his shoulder and tossed him in the boat. That was an experience Squall would not like to relive, so he just followed behind Laguna and prayed that he didn't run into anyone he knew. Not that anyone he knew was likely to be in FH, but still. He looked ridiculous. He felt ridiculous. Laguna was ridiculous. And he would be teased without mercy if anyone ever caught wind of this.

Laguna did all the talking, as usual, and rented them a small row boat and two fishing poles. They set off, away from the main pier, but had to remain within the pillars of the town. Any further out, and the current could send them out to sea. Squall didn't actually mind the idea of fishing; it was something that was usually done in silence, but Squall was fishing with Laguna, and that meant there would be talking. A lot of talking.

"I'm gonna get you little fishy!" Laguna sang over and over. "Fishy, fishy, fishy, come out, come out!"

Squall had tuned it out for a long time, but it was starting to get on his nerves.

"They can hear you, you know," Squall said after about an hour of listening to Laguna attempt to compel the fish to jump in the boat. "All that noise is probably scaring them off."

"Fish don't have ears."

Squall knew better, but he didn't bother to correct him.

"...then why are you singing to them?" Squall asked through gritted teeth.

"Because it's fun!" Laguna said. "Fishy, fishy, I've got a nice fat worm for you!"

Squall's hand met his forehead with a loud and painful smack. He was thankful that no one was around to hear that last statement.

"I'm gonna get you, little fishy," Laguna began again. "Come out, come out..."

Squall leveled him with a cold stare and Laguna heaved a sigh as he cast his line in the water again and immediately reeled it back in. Squall frowned as he watched Laguna cast again.

"How in the hell-" Squall started and then clamped his mouth shut.

Laguna obviously did not understand the way fishing worked. Instead of casting his line and pulling it in slowly, he would immediately reel it back in as soon as the line hit the water. Then, he would be disappointed that he didn't catch anything. He did this over and over, and Squall noticed there wasn't even bait on the hook.

"Who taught you to fish?" Squall asked in a snarky tone.

"I taught myself. Why?" Laguna replied.

"Because you are terrible at it." Squall deadpanned.

"Oh, and you're so much better?" Laguna retorted.

At that moment, Squall's line went taught and the end of his fishing pole dipped toward the water. Squall immediately started to reel it back in and felt a strong pull on his line. It wasn't easy - the fish was putting up a good fight. Squall patiently reeled it in and after several minutes, pulled a fish out of the water. It was fairly large, at least thirty inches long, and Laguna was practically jumping for joy, making the boat rock from side to side in his excitement.

Squall was pretty pleased with himself as well. He'd never caught a fish before. He'd gone fishing several times with his grandfather back in Winhill but he never got a bite, and now he had a thirty inch Balamb Bass flopping on the floor of the boat.

"Well done Squall!" Laguna praised.

Maybe this trip wasn't such a bad idea after all, he thought as he smiled at his catch.

He couldn't help but smile at his accomplishment. It wasn't a big smile, but it was still a smile, and it didn't escape Laguna's notice. They were both proud. Squall was proud of his Balamb Bass, and Laguna was proud of Squall.

Despite the rocky start, it was a fairly good day. Laguna even managed to catch a fish, too. It wasn't nearly as big as Squall's but he was still proud of himself, he had gotten so excited over the fish that he had managed to fall out of the boat and nearly lost the fish in the process.

When they finally pulled in their lines and brought the boat back to the pier they were both starving. The boat master had been thoroughly impressed with Squall's catch and offered to take a photo. Even though Squall didn't really want to be seen in his current attire, he did want a picture with his fish for posterity, so he reluctantly agreed. He even smiled a little, and that made Laguna happy.

Laguna offered to get the fish mounted, but Squall declined. Catching a fish had been kind of fun, but he didn't want its dead, glassy eyes staring at him every time he went in the den at home. He was happy just having the picture. They let the boat master keep both fish.

When they headed back to the hotel they decided to stop into a small restaurant for a late lunch at a seafood restaurant. Laguna obviously didn't care that he was soaking wet and smelled like fish and seawater.

The meal had started off silent, as they were both too hungry to be able to hold a conversation. Toward the end of the meal, Laguna sat back and looked at Squall with a grin.

"So what do you think of this road trip now?"

"I still hate the idea," Squall snapped back.

After a minute or two of silence, Squall conceded.

"But, I guess it has potential…maybe."

A slow, smug smile lit Laguna's face and he grinned happily at his boy. Finally! Squall was starting to come around, and it had only been one day! Laguna was certain that by the end of the trip they would be best friends and this trip would go down in memory as their best adventure ever.

After they returned to the hotel, Laguna took a shower and changed while Squall packed away all his new things in his suitcase and against his better judgment, didn't throw away all the stupid sweaters and reject clothing Laguna packed for him. He didn't know why he was keeping them. They weren't really even fit for the donation pile, but still, he folded them neatly and packed them anyway.

Once finished, they gathered their belongings and loaded them into the car. By dinner time they were off. They boarded the ferry and settled in for the four hour ride to Balamb.

* * *

Aright, so now that that's up, I'll be taking a little break from fanfiction for a little bit. I've got some original work I need to get done and I think I left this and "I'll be your Knight" at good stopping places, so Ttfn!


	3. Chapter 3

"Mmmmphmmmph bmmphbm!" Laguna shouted, excitedly jumping up.

He practically fell over the railing with all his nonsense. He pulled Squall closer while furiously pointing at the shore.

"Bmmphm!" He shouted again.

"Either spit out the banana or wait till you swallow to speak," Squall scolded tossing Laguna's arm off his shoulder.

Squall didn't even know where Laguna had gotten a banana. The ferry didn't even have food. He'd probably managed to charm some young mother out of it, even though he could have just waited a few minutes till they got to Balamb. None the less he got one and practically shoved the entire thing in his mouth.

"Look it's Balamb!" Laguna shouted after forcing the banana down his throat.

"Yes, I see that. I also heard the announcement not five minutes ago, that we would be docking soon," Squall replied dryly.

Balamb was much more crowded than Laguna had expected. The last time he visited it was quiet and very small, of course the last time he visited was nearly twenty years prior and Balamb had more than doubled in size. Now it was a booming resort town, practically bursting with people dressed mainly in swimwear.

"Wow look at all the people! What do you think is going on?" Laguna asked. "Some kind of festival?"

"You're joking, right?" Squall asked. "It's spring break, resort towns are popular party locations."

"Really?! Then let's go join in!" Laguna yelled before running to the car.

Squall rolled his eyes almost hard enough to make his head fall off and let out a hefty sigh before reluctantly following Laguna.

The people in the town didn't seem to care that they were blocking traffic, they flooded the streets with their parties and didn't take notice of the black sedan that was slowly creeping through the streets. It took them nearly an hour just to get one block from the harbor.

"They'll probably move faster if you'd use the horn," Squall sighed.

"Oh… what's the hurry?" Laguna asked brushing him off.

"I'd like to get to the hotel before dying of old age," the teenager sighed.

"Don't be such a drama queen, Squall," Laguna laughed.

Squall was never big on crowds. He barely tolerated being with just one or two other people, he preferred solitude. It was a trait that Squall would freely admit came from his mother. There were times when he lived with her in Winhill that they would go days at a time without having to say a word to each other. Then she got sick and Squall was sent to Esthar, the land ruled by a moron.

Laguna was the opposite; he was happy being around any number of people. He never seemed to want to give Squall any kind of space half the time. He was always dragging Squall to crowded places.

"Can you just hurry up? I'm tired," Squall said laying his seat flat and closing his eyes.

"Yes boss," Laguna mocked, childishly scrunching up his face.

"I saw that," Squall said causing Laguna to stick out his tongue and blow a raspberry.

"You are such a child," Squall sighed.

"Life is too short to be serious all the time," Laguna retorted.

"Well you are not serious at any time," Squall scolded.

"Of course, not," Laguna shrugged. "Life would be very boring if I were."

"…whatever," Squall sighed.

There wasn't much point is Squall arguing with Laguna about this again. It usually always ended with Squall getting angry and Laguna making a joke out of the whole thing. Squall decided he was better off just going to sleep.

* * *

He didn't know how long it took them to get to the hotel but Squall jumped awake when the car came to a complete stop in a parking garage. The yellow lights were slightly disorienting as Squall forced himself into a more vertical position.

Squall blinked a few times and looked over to see Laguna staring at him with a stupid smile.

"We're here!" Laguna said excitedly, too excited for Squall's taste.

Squall said nothing but let out a low grumble as he opened the door to get out.

"Where exactly is here?" Squall asked groggily.

"The Balamb Royal Hotel," Laguna answered, pulling their bags from the trunk. "We're almost outside town, but it was the only hotel that didn't have a 'no vacancy' sign out."

"That's a thing? I thought that only existed in movies," Squall picked up his bag and threw it over his shoulder before following Laguna to the elevator.

"Movies are usually based on real life, son," Laguna chuckled. "Though the whole booking hotels online probably made them a little obsolete."

Squall rolled his eyes and followed silently after Laguna.

The girl behind the check-in counter was far too peppy for how busy it was in Squall's opinion but Laguna found it delightful and started making jokes. Each one was worse than the last and Squall couldn't tell if the girl was genuinely entertained or she was drugged. Considering how casual she was about joking with Laguna when the lobby was full of people Squall opted to believe the latter.

"Well son, there is good news and bad news," Laguna said leaving the check in counter.

"What's the bad news?" Squall asked.

"Every hotel in town is booked solid," Laguna laughed.

"Fantastic," Squall sighed. "What's the good news then?"

"The girl at the counter gave us coupons for free dinner down at the pier!" Laguna answered flashing the pieces of paper.

"Where are we going to sleep?" Squall asked trying to stay calm.

"There's way too much going on around here!" Laguna laughed. "Who needs sleep?"

"I do," Squall said.

"We'll, sleep when we're dead!" Laguna chuckled pulling Squall back toward the parking garage.

"You know by the time we get to the restaurant it's gonna be closed," Squall said putting his bag back in the trunk of the car.

"Who said we were taking the car?" Laguna replied. "We'll walk."

Squall groaned and followed Laguna out to the street. Even though they were far from the city center there was still a large crowd of people. The route Laguna took, thankfully, had slightly less people but that was primarily due to the route going through the fish market and the smell was unbearable.

"Hey, Squall," Laguna called as he picked up a fish from one of the vendors. " _Carp_ 'e dium," he laughed childishly.

Squall rolled his eyes and let out an exasperated sigh.

"Oh, c'mon, that was funny!" Laguna said still laughing.

"Whatever," Squall sighed silently.

"I'm _kraken_ myself up," Laguna smiled, then continued down the road.

Squall managed to tune his father out until they got to the restaurant but the fish puns just got worse when he saw the name. The fish tank. It seemed innocent enough but the logo was a fish was in a military tank.

"Do you get it Squall?" Laguna asked nudging at his son. "Do you need time to _mullet_ over?"

"Let's just eat and leave," Squall grumbled opening the door.

The place was crowed like everything else in this tiny town. Squall begrudgingly told the hostess there were two in the party and to his surprise they were seated almost immediately. He was grateful considering he hadn't eaten since FH and was starving. They were left with menus and Laguna ordered them something called "Shark Attack" to drink.

"Do you know what you want to eat, son?" Laguna asked glancing over the menu.

The music was loud but not loud enough to drown Laguna's much to Squall's dismay.

"Do you need time to _mullet_ over?" Laguna laughed when Squall didn't answer.

"you already used that one!" Squall barked.

"Sorry, if you can think of a better one, let _minnow_ ," Laguna said wryly.

Squall rolled his eyes when the waitress brought over a large punchbowl sized drink with blue and red liquid divided in it, candy fish and sharks throughout and little bits of candy on the bottom to make it look like a fishbowl. He was grateful that this might silence Laguna's punning for a short period.

Laguna ordered them both the Surf and Turf, while Squall started drinking from one of the straws in the bowl hoping to curb his hunger pangs a little before they got the food. It was sweet with a slight burning sensation but it wasn't enough to stop him from drinking, and he drank a lot, nearly half the bowl before the pangs disappeared. It wasn't long after that Squall started to feel, strange. He felt light headed and relaxed; almost giddy.

"Sorry for being _shellfish_ and ordering for us," Laguna laughed.

Squall suppressed a chuckle, surprised that he even had the urge to chuckle and responded with: "you did that on _porpoise_ , didn't you?"

"Look who's finally gotten into the spirit of things!" Laguna laughed.

"I think this drink is alcoholic," Squall replied with a chuckle of his own.

"Good thing the drinking age here is 18!" Laguna replied.

"I'm 17, dad," Squall retorted.

"I won't tell if you don't," Laguna shrugged.

"But that's illegal," Squall said.

"One year isn't that big of a deal son," Laguna rolled his eyes taking a giant drink of his own from the bowl.

By the time their food arrived they were both very drunk and working on their second bowl. They were both laughing hysterically at some unknown joke, the odds were high that neither one even said anything but just laughed because the other was laughing.

After they finished their food and second bowl of alcohol they staggered back out into the crowded streets. Laguna said something that Squall didn't hear when he turned to ask Laguna to repeat himself he had disappeared, leaving Squall standing alone in the middle of the street.

"Dad?" Squall called but the crowd drowned him out.

Not knowing which way his father went Squall had to guess. He didn't know where he was going and was too drunk to care. If he was being honest he enjoyed the time to himself without his father talking his ear off.

Squall ended up outside of a club, it seemed more upscale than the place Laguna had taken him to. As a couple walked out he heard a piano playing, it seemed like a much more relaxed environment so he dove in.

It was an unexpected thing to find in a town currently dominated by drunk teenagers. It seemed like a big band swing club but the rest of the band was taking a break while the pianist played. Everyone in the club was wearing nicer clothes than squall who was still wearing the tropical flower shirt and shorts.

"You're the best-looking guy here," he heard a woman's voice right behind him.

Squall turned slightly to see a girl with long black hair, fair skin and dark brown eyes smiling at him.

"Me?" Squall asked.

"Yes you," she laughed. "Dance with me?"

Squall shook his head no and was about to walk away but she stopped him.

"Let me guess, you'll only dance with someone you like?" she smiled and grabbed his chin and forced him to look at her. "Look deeply into my eyes… _you're going to like me, you're going to like me, you're going to like me._ "

She let go of his face and tilted her head to the side, "did it work?"

Squall chuckled, "I can't dance," he lied, hoping that would get rid of her.

"It's easy," she laughed. "I got stood up and I don't want to be on the dancefloor alone," she said dragging him to the floor.

The rest of the band returned from their break and started to play what sounded like a waltz. He didn't want to dance for several reasons; he was drunk and not very well balanced, he didn't know this woman and the most important reason was that he didn't like dancing.

She put his hands into position and forced him to move with the rhythm of the music. Squall decided he would get her to leave him alone by being the worst dance partner. He moved out of time and even trampled on her feet because of it. When they swayed one way they even bumped into another couple, he thought that would surely be the end of their dance. It wasn't. She smiled at him and they kept dancing. She was persistent so he decided to just give her what she wanted, so he started to dance correctly.

By the time the song ended they were standing face to face, he couldn't explain why his heart was beating so fast. He thought it might have been the activity coupled with the exertion of dancing but a small part of him knew it was the girl he was dancing with.

"That was fun," she smiled. "Let's do it again sometime," she gave him a wink and disappeared into the crowd, leaving Squall gaping after her.

"Squall," he heard Laguna calling, "I've been looking everywhere for you!"

"Where have you been?" Squall demanded, snapping out of his daze.

"I rented us a Yacht!" Laguna said proudly.

* * *

Bright sun and the sound of seagulls and the ocean waves woke Squall the next morning. He looked around and found himself on the beach, covered in sand and only wearing his underwear and a purple feather boa. His head felt like it would split open at any moment and his stomach was ready to void whatever contents it possessed.

Squall didn't know what time it was or even what day it was for that matter. To top it off he didn't even know if he was in Balamb anymore. The last thing he remembered was Laguna telling him about a yacht and the party on the deck before he boarded. He wasn't sure if he was drugged or if he just drank too much. He was willing to bet it was the latter.

"You look like death, son," Laguna laughed.

"I feel like death," Squall groaned. "Why don't you look like death?"

"I stopped drinking after dinner," Laguna laughed handing his son a bottle of water. "Someone had to be responsible!"

Squall rolled his eyes and suppressed a chuckle at the idea of his father being responsible. "Where are we?" he asked.

"Dollet beach," Laguna answered.

Squall groaned again and looked around for his clothes which were thankfully not far away and got dressed.

"Are we going back to Balamb to get the car?" Squall asked.

"Nah, I have it being brought here, no sense back tracking," Laguna laughed. "Let's just go get some breakfast."

Squall wasn't about to object, food might make him feel better but then he started to frantically search through the sand for an item he seemed to have misplaced.

"What are you looking for son?" Laguna asked.

"My ring is missing," Squall answered.

"The lion one?"

"Yeah, I can't find it."

"do you remember where you had it last?" Laguna asked.

"On my hand," Squall answered with a roll of his eyes.

"You probably took it off in the car or something, I'm sure its fine," Laguna assured.

Squall didn't remember taking it off but Laguna was probably right. Squall let out a sign and gave up his search and followed his father to breakfast.

* * *

Hey look, a new chapter! Please review!


	4. Chapter 4

Squall did nothing but wish for a pair of sunglasses. The sun did nothing to help his headache, if anything it made it worse. He had a hard time keeping up with Laguna, he didn't understand how he could walk so fast and not even be hungover. Squall was mixed with feelings of envy and bitterness. Laguna likely drank way more than Squall yet he didn't suffer nearly as bad.

"Were here!" Laguna announced too loudly.

The smell of the food was both intoxicating and nauseating. The restaurant was too loud and too crowded but his stomach decided it was too empty to justify skipping the meal.

They were seated quickly despite the crowd. Squall suspected Laguna might have slipped the hostess some gil to get them seated faster.

A gesture Squall greatly appreciated.

Nothing on the menu looked remotely appetizing to Squall. His stomach churned the farther he got down the menu. He ordered the one thing that didn't make him want to vomit, a simple side salad. A decision that earned him a strange look from Laguna.

"What?" Squall snapped, not in any mood for judgement.

"You know, greasy food is the best cure for a hangover," Laguna shrugged.

"That sounds like a lie," Squall argued.

"believe what you want, all I know is greasy food has always made me feel better when I have a hangover."

"I'm not you," Squall sneered.

Laguna couldn't argue with him, Squall was more like his mother. Some of that was likely because Raine raised him alone. A fact that saddened Laguna.

He wanted so much to be with Raine and help her raise Squall, but he could never get away from Esthar for any extended period. Raine tried living in Esthar with Laguna, but she hated not seeing the mountains of Winhill or the flower fields or being able to go out without armed guards.

"when will the car get here? I want to find my ring," Squall asked.

"Should be soon," Laguna murmured. "What's so special about that ring?"

"If you don't know, then you don't care, so I'm not going to bother explaining it," Squall barked.

Squall was mean when he was hungover. Laguna rolled his eyes and started sipping at his drink and looking around at all the people in the little café. Most of them were around Squall's age, likely there for the same reason as them. Nursing a hangover. Most of them would end up getting drunk again later in the evening.

"So, what would you like to do today?" Laguna asked.

"Sleep," Squall grumbled.

"You can't waste a nice day like today sleeping," Laguna laughed.

"Watch me," Squall said with a glare.

Laguna rolled his eyes and looked down at the newspaper the waitress left. A brightly colored ad caught his attention: _"Last day of the ChocoMog Carnival!"_

That was the perfect thing to do!

The ChocoMog carnival was something that happened once every ten years or so and Laguna had always wanted to go. It was never in the same place twice and he'd always missed it. How did he get so lucky to just happen upon it?

He wanted to announce his plan to Squall but decided it would be best to leave it a surprise.

The rest of their breakfast was silent but Laguna had a hard time containing his excitement. His random bursts earned him some strange looks from those around him, mainly Squall.

"Why are you being weird?" Squall asked.

"No reason," Laguna smiled.

"I know you're lying, but I'm too tired to care right now," Squall sighed leaning back in his seat.

Laguna quickly paid the bill as soon as the waitress brought it to him and bounded out the door.

Squall groaned before following his father, Laguna was up to something and Squall was in no mood to deal with it. All he wanted was to check the car for his ring then get some sleep that wasn't on a beach.

Thankfully, the car was waiting right outside.

Squall searched every inch of the car but still didn't find his ring. It was lost and Squall wasn't happy about it. If it weren't for Laguna's stupid road trip he would still have it.

Wherever they were going next, Squall prayed it would be somewhere quiet.

Laguna bounced in the driver's seat as they weaved through the streets, shaking the entire car and making Squall's stomach churn.

"Stop that," Squall groaned pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I can't," Laguna laughed. "Too excited!"

"Whatever you're planning, count me out."

"You'll love it!"

Squall groaned and leaned the seat back, ignoring Laguna or at least trying to.

He started to doze off when the car jerked to a stop. He jumped up and looked around frantically. Had Laguna hit someone? If he did it was impossible to tell.

All around the car there were people dressed in crazy chocobo or Moogle outfits. Yellow and white balloons floated around all originating from a central point Squall couldn't see from a distance.

"What is this?" Squall demanded.

"ONLY THE BEST THING IN THE ENTIRE WORLD!" Laguna yelled as he jumped out of the car.

Squall growled and laid back down on the seat. He refused to engage in this nonsense but Laguna wouldn't leave him alone. He opened the passenger side door and yanked Squall out of his seat.

"This is a once in a lifetime opportunity, son. I'm not going to let you miss it!"

* * *

Kiros loomed over his desk just staring at the newspaper he'd been sent from Balamb.

 _"_ _Party boy President"_

Not the kind of headline he wanted to wake up to, the picture that went with it was worse.

Laguna wearing a colorful party hat and giant sunglasses and a pink feather boa. Laguna was getting out of hand with this road trip nonsense. His shenanigans were making Esthar the laughing stock of the world.

"Sir, this just came for you," his assistant announced as he entered the office.

Kiros took the large manila envelope from him with a halfhearted smile. With any luck, this would be some good news.

The contents were unexpected, a digital camera and a piece of paper with Squall's signature.

"We need to find them now!" Kiros ordered jumping to his feet.

"The president last used his credit card to rent a yacht from Balamb to Dollet," his assistant informed.

"Then we'll go to Dollet," Kiros ordered heading for the air station.

* * *

Squall was fuming.

Not only was he in the loudest place in the world he was forced to wear the dumbest chocobo hat he'd ever seen. To top it all off Laguna had disappeared somewhere in the crowd. This was the worst day of his life.

"Why so sad, Kupo?" a feminine voice asked.

Squall refused to acknowledge her presence but the girl wearing a full Moogle costume made it hard for him to ignore her.

"Leave me alone," he ordered.

"Someone is a grumpy Gus, Kupo!" she said covering her fake eyes with her hands. "I know! You need a big hug from Mog, Kupo!"

"Don't even thing about—" before he could get another word out he was swept up in a tight hug by the freakishly strong Moogle woman.

"There, now don't you feel all warm inside, Kupo?" she asked with her hands on her fake cheeks.

Squall was filled with a blinding rage, he wasn't normally a mean person but he lost it. His hand started shaking and he punched the fake head making it spin around on the girl's shoulders causing her to fall into a balloon vendor and making balloons go everywhere.

"How rude, Kupo!" she cried.

"What's your problem, bro?" a masculine voice asked.

This time it was a tall chocobo getting in his face.

"I want left alone," Squall hissed.

"So, you think that gives you the right to hit a girl?" the chocobo asked pushing Squall in the chest. "Huh tough guy? Are you afraid to pick on someone your own size?"

Squall threw another punch but it only made the chocobo stumble a few steps.

"Oh, it's on!" the chocobo announced.

He charged at Squall but Squall easily dodged his attack and pushed him into a pile of stuffed moogles.

"Take this, meanie!" the Moogle yelled as she jumped on Squall's back.

The chocobo managed to get back on his feet while Squall struggled to get the Moogle off his back. The chocobo started charging again, this time Squall couldn't dodge. He braced himself for the impact but in never came. Laguna tackled the chocobo and started punching the giant foam head.

"Leave my son alone!" He yelled as he continued to wail on the chocobo.

It wasn't long before the police came and pulled Laguna off the Chocobo and the Moogle off Squall. All four of them were taken into custody.

* * *

Kiros paced throughout the passenger cabin of the Ragnarok. He thought of all the things he was going to scold Laguna for.

"Sir?" his assistant called.

"What is it?" Kiros demanded.

"The Dollet police department is on the phone. They want to confirm that they have the president in custody," he answered nervously.

"What did he do?" Kiros demanded.

"He and Squall got into a fight at the ChocoMog carnival."

Kiros sighed and took the phone from his assistant.

"This is Vice President Kiros Seagill, that is in fact the President you have in custody. Do not release him until I get there," Kiros didn't wait for a response before hanging up.

"Excuse me!" Laguna yelled. "When are we going to be let go?"

"Sorry sir, we were just told not to release you till the vice president arrives," the police officer answered.

"What if I gave you 1000 gil? Would you let us out then?" Laguna asked with a smile.

"I'd charge you with bribing a police officer," the officer said darkly.

"Laguna, just sit and wait," Squall ordered from the bench.

Laguna grumbled and sat next to Squall.

He didn't want to get scolded by Kiros but there wasn't any way of avoiding it now.

"Looks the like the road trip is over," Laguna sighed.

"Good," Squall said flatly.

"Why are you so mad?" Laguna asked.

"Why? Because you forced me to go on an international road trip, didn't pack any of my clothes and forced me to go to a stupid carnival when all I wanted to do was sleep and get rid of this terrible headache!" Squall yelled. "On top of all that I lost the ring mom gave me for my birthday before she died and you don't even care."

"I didn't know she gave you that ring, I'm sorry."

"Of course you didn't know, because you were never around when I was growing up. You were too busy goofing off in Esthar," Squall glared at Laguna. "Just leave me alone till Kiros gets here."

Squall laid down on the bench to try and take a nap.

* * *

It wasn't long before Kiros arrived and he had the angriest look on his face Squall had ever seen.

"Hey buddy!" Laguna laughed nervously.

"Do the two of you have any idea how much trouble you're in?" Kiros asked.

"What did I do?" Squall demanded.

"You don't remember?"

"Remember what?"

Kiros held up the paper he was sent for Squall to look at.

"I-I got married?!"

"To a girl named Rinoa Heartilly," Kiros sighed.

"I don't remember any of that," Squall's face turned white.

"Maybe these photos will jog your memory," Kiros offered him the camera that came with the marriage license. "You can look through them on the way to Deling City."

Squall walked slowly through the police station to the car flipping through the pictures on the camera.

"Kiros," Laguna whispered pulling him aside. "Can we make one last stop before Deling?"

* * *

I know I didn't state it but the Moogle and Chocobo were Selphie and Irvine.


End file.
